The 16th December 2012 incident guy is NOT a hero.

So, here is another message that is flooded over Whats App and Facebook on friendship day’s eve. I received it on Whats App from quite a few friends and in groups but chose to ignore it initially. I thought that it is something nobody would trust or believe in and would be forgotten like other forwarded messages, but that didn’t happen. More people messaged me the same thing and many even posted on Facebook. Well, this was when I almost typed to one of the friends how I thought this message was ridiculous and makes no sense but then I thought that I should rather blog about this. Reading this message made me feel furious and I am strongly against what is being conveyed in this message. Copy-pasting the exact text from Facebook with some formatting changes. (Content remains same):


A year ago in-front of his eyes his girlfriend was brutally raped by six bastards in a running bus of Delhi. He fought till the time he was beaten blue with an iron rod. They broke his leg, robbed him, snatched his mobile & left him almost naked.  He fought till the time he could. Then on that chilling cold night he was thrown from the running bus along with his girl friend. They were naked, drained, exhausted & both were bleeding for different reasons.  He tried to stop passing cars & kept on begging for a piece of shawl to wrap his naked girl friend & finally he got it after 40 minutes. Then he took her to the hospital, admitted her, called the police, called her parents & did every possible co-operation that a true friend should do in the hour of need. He could have fled from the bus – he did not. He could have left her on the road – he did not. He could have claimed fame & money (as the father of Nirbhaya who took Rs 25 lakhs from UP CM,a job for his son & many more from many people in his daughter’s name ) – but he did not. He could have claimed his treatment money from Govt – he did not. He could have become the most frequently seen face in the electronic media in exchange of money – he did not.  If this is not friendship then what is friendship??  When the entire country roared for the girl no one thought what this boy had gone through that night. He is not a film star or a cricketer. He is Awindra Pratap Pandey a boy from Gorakshapur in UP, the boy who loved his girl from the core of his heart.  When this boy is there somewhere in anonymity, why we Indians should celebrate friendship day on 3rd August to copy others nations??  We should celebrate friendship day in India on 16th December to salute the spirit of Awindra who proved what friendship means. Let 16th Dec be an official friendship day in India.  Am I talking sense?? If yes then please share this & give your opinion here. Make this a right platform of social awareness!! This is a broadcast message. Frwd to all your Frnds


So what makes me furious after reading this message? In simple words: this text message is nothing but a cheap- cheap like raping someone – attempt to gain something. I will not call it publicity because this isn’t any kind of publicity.  First things first, the person who made up this message is nothing but a jerk, a jerk who possibly is also uneducated and is not aware of the actual incident that took place on that day. I will surely give the reasons to why I say this in coming part of the post.

Other thing is who might have actually written this message?  

I think who two individuals are responsible for such a message.  One- The guy himselfAwindra Pratap Pandey  

Second – Somebody who has extremists like opinions and ideology. Those people who go out on streets on Friendship and valentine day to create nuisance, disturb people and yes not to forget- vandalize public and private property. They are also those people who would forcefully shut down a shop and then open it again only to shut it down again, so that the news camera recording them has their best footage. They also approve the footage later on.


Whosoever wrote this message had no sense of idea what he was writing, the possibility is that somebody just edited the message and started sending it out to the people without realizing what blunder they were doing. Hence, this proves the jerk part I mentioned above.  

The message reads, “A year ago in-front of his eyes”

I read this message on August 2nd 2014 – a day prior to Friendship day. If you are probably reading the above mentioned message for the first time then you must be reading this on August 3rd 2014 or later.  The incident took place on an unfortunate day – December 16th 2012. So, in the most logical sense, this incident didn’t happen “a year ago”. At least, 1 year, 7 months and 18 days have passed since then. I wonder why the person who wrote this message didn’t realize this small little thing- another point that prove what a jerk he/she was.  


This also shows how much this person was aware of facts and figures of this incident; it didn’t matter to him when the incident happened. What was important for him was to pass on his extremist opinion about how the boy was hero and how friendship day should not be celebrated on August 3rd.  


Another part of message says “Then he took her to the hospital, admitted her, called the police,”  


Well, my dear friend who wrote this message. THIS guy didn’t take her to hospital, he didn’t admit her to hospital, and he didn’t call the police. It was a passing by car and person in that car who did three things – in same order as mentioned. Took both of them to hospital, admitted them and called the police. From the very first day of this incident I have blamed the boy for everything. It was he who was responsible for everything that happened. Not the rape, because rape is not something that happened because of him. He didn’t rape her. Rape happened because of some sick minded people who were drunk and were no more humans. They acted – animal like.

 But, Awindra Pratap Pandey is supposed to be blamed for everything that happened on that night before they were thrown out of the bus.  A wise man would never board a private bus with a girl. Period. Not even in most stupid sense this idea looks good, nobody in this universe will say that this step was right. The problem is not that you have taken your (girl) friend out for a movie at late night. That is fine but the problem is that you decided to board the bus that is suspicious in its first look already.  

Even back then, no auto walla in Delhi would have denied taking you guys anywhere. No matter what, all they would have done is charged you a little extra. They might have said upfront that we will charge extra Rs 200 – which I see should not have been an issue. Or even they might have said that we will drop you until one point and then you should manage at your own or may be take another auto.

 IF not this, then private cab business has been flowering well in Delhi since 2010. One call and the cabs picks you up from any part of the city and drops you like wise. I wonder why you didn’t use these options and decided to take that bus instead.

I will not be a hypocrite here and hide things I feel. I completely see a reason why you might have taken her in that bus, you might have already knew that this bus would be completely vacant and you might be successful in your mischiefs. Yes, even the girl might have been aware of your intentions and this might have been a mutual decision too, but I will still not blame the girl for anything. She got enough of what she never deserved. I would like her to stay in peace always- wherever she is.  

Your mistake was that being a man, you didn’t bother about that girl’s safety. I am not saying that we as men are of sole responsibility of taking care of it, but in general sense, we as men are expected to keep our women protected. Yes, I am ashamed to say that we are also the men who rape women.

Also, in most typical sense, we as men are expected to give our women a sense of protection- no feminist stuff here – women can protect themselves or how they too can fight for their rights.  I am not saying that women cannot protect themselves, but as men we should always be more concerned towards our women’s security than anything else. Not because the city is not safe but because we as men know it very well that there are other men around us who are looking for a slight opportunity to play “ I am not a good guy” role.

I certainly appreciate that you didn’t escape from the place of incident in terms of keeping yourself out of this whole incident. It was certainly brave of you and I do pat your back for that.  It is mentioned in the message above how you could have claimed for fame and money like her father did. Please give me an opportunity to answer that statement.  

You- Yes you Mr Awindra Pratap Pandey were the one who went to Zee News studios and gave a live interview. You not only demanded fame at that time but you also jeopardized the complete case. Do you realize that somebody could have even got you killed, as you were the only eyewitness in this case? No you didn’t realize and you continued to give news interviews, your audacity was that you didn’t even ask the news team to cover your face with black strip. Not because you were guilty of anything but because you were the only lead in that case.


I am not sure about demanding money part, I think you never did nor you were anyways liable to demand for any money- heck man, you were somewhere responsible for the whole mess and then demanding money on top of it would have been an epic failure.  On the part where it is mentioned “the father of Nirbhaya who took Rs 25 lakhs from UP CM, a job for his son & many more from many people in his daughter’s name”  Yes, he accepted that money and some land too from state government. So what’s the fuss about? Do we even realize what his loss was? His only daughter- his only daughter who was well educated – his only elder child – his only hope – his daughter for who he had to sell his land so that her education could be supported. No, the money could never bring his daughter back but that money must have been/is much helpful in terms of supporting the family- a family that was ripped apart after this incident. The money they got was not in exchange of their daughter.

They got the money so that they could at least survive. At least they could go back to their village and settle down- in grief of their only daughter.

 In the next part of the message there is a contradictory statement  

If this is not friendship then what is friendship?”  

So, within a message, the love he had for a girl turned to be mere friendship- what and why this drastic change?  The boy never admitted in public that she was his girlfriend or they loved each other, he only mentioned that they were good friends. I am wondering what did he do that he didn’t deserve anonymity and he should have been a pubic face. Of course, there all the reasons for him to stay silent and not reveal his identity- which he eventually did after he gave interviews to Zee News and Aaj Tak. Revealing his identity only means that more and more people must have got to know about the real identity of the girl. His friend must have known the girl as his friend and as it is being claimed about being girlfriend, more people close to this man would have recognized who actually she was.  

What is so amazing that Awindra Pratap Pandey did that we should consider 16th December as Friendship day of India?

What he did on that day was shameful- he didn’t bother about her female friend’s security – he possibly for some reasons didn’t call for a private cab. He possibly because of some mean intentions took the girl into a private bus.  

Spreading these kind of messages is not only polluting our society but is affecting the overall thought process too of our youth. I feel so obnoxious that there are humans – read again humans who are enough educated sharing these messages without even giving a thought about what they are sharing and what exactly is the meaning. Out of seven people who sent me this same message along with three status updates on my Facebook news feed wasn’t there ANYONE who bothered to question how it is “one year…” how “ it was not this guy, but somebody else who called the police” how “ that money was not in exchange of their dead daughter” how the guy did get his piece of cake in terms of gaining fame after he first appeared on Zee news? I sincerely see no reason to salute this man, but do I have enough reasons to salute this girl who died, this family who is surviving on those 25 lakh, that brother who is now into a job because of his dead sister. I certainly do. I certainly and most humbly do salute these people.  

They are living under the pain of their dead daughter every moment. The money did give them enough to survive but every time this family would sit down to have their dinner; they would be thinking that their daughter had to die so that they could eat in peace. Every time her brother would go to his office – he would be living under the pressure that his sister had to die so that he could earn a living.  

Also, one part of the message mentions that how he was taking care of her girlfriend and the other part says how he was being a true friend to her. I am confused, because if the girlfriend part is more true then shouldn’t this message have came around Valentine’s Day? Makes more sense right?  


P.S.: My absolute condolence remains with the family of the girl, their loss is unimaginable and I will always pray for the girl’s soul and her family. I also extend my support to the guy as well. It was unfortunate that he was around when everything happened. No matter, how right or wrong I might say he is, there will always be a sense of guilt in his mind through out his life.  


Thanks Priyanshi Gulati for proof reading.

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26 thoughts on “The 16th December 2012 incident guy is NOT a hero.

  1. I totally agree with the writer’s opinion. I’d rather never have a male friend like Awindra.
    Pathetic asshole.
    Also, finished watching the Delhi crime series on Netflix last night. Horrific insights to this case.

  2. Aditya I feel enraged when I get random forwards with no sense in them at all. And It feels so silly that people get so influenced by such posts that they feel it to be their duty to spread it around. And this message was outright foolish. I so appreciate your effort at bringing this out.

  3. I read this message from one of my groups on WhatsApp just a few days ago too, and I must say, I was just about to glorify this post on my blog. However, after reading your take on this scenario – I beg to differ and agree with you very much too, Aditya! Several other glitches aside, what really brought things into perspective for me was the fact that he boarded a private bus in the first place; this justification of yours is what drove your point home! And it makes perfect sense, now doesn’t it, as to why he had to board that private bus in the first place – I mean, private buses are only meant for those passengers who would’ve exclusively booked them for themselves, unlike those that pertain to public transportation!

    What’s more, this is elementary common sense, so there’s no other substantial factor for Pandey to actually counter this particular argument. In conclusion, I absolutely admire you for boldly speaking your word – each and every bit of your blog is impressively truthful, and it is this very truth that evokes positive power, after all. There you go. **Peace**

    • Hello Shabnam,

      I see that you are here for the first time (on my blog). I am humbly glad that you took time to read this piece and made a comment to. Appreciate that 🙂

      Sounds great that you liked the post and found my prospective logical too. The incident continues to evoke questions among all of us and many of these questions are those we still need to find an answer for.

      Now that you have liked this post, I would humbly request you to read another post of mine : This was a post NOT liked by many people and they went ahead to abuse me, threaten me and what not. I want to hear as much opinion as possible on this post and even if you choose to dislike the post or my opinion there I would still appreciate the fact that you read it.

      Looking forward 🙂

  4. A very well written post Aditya. I agree with you completely. Although I feel the girl was somewhere at fault too, not because she was out at night, but because at the end of the day, we too are responsible for our own safety and boarding that bus was a mistake she committed too. In no way am I saying that, what happened was because of her, the guy’s mostly to blame for that. When you decide to go for a movie or dinner with your friend/girlfriend and are returning at that time of night, the girl’s safety should be the first and foremost thing on your mind.
    Thanks a lot for sharing this. I hope more and more people read this blog and realize what consequences even the smallest of mistakes could lead to.

    • Hey Patricia,

      Glad to hear from you, looks like this the first time you are making a comment on my blog.

      It feels great when a woman is in favor of what I say and what I meant to say. Yes, she was at fault but then what she got in return is something much more than than what she deserved.

      It is obviously very important for anyone to keep their safety in mind before indulging in anything which can turn out to be ugly.

      Please do share the post. 🙂


  5. I do support you on the issue of not making 16 dec- friendship day.
    As there would be other cases which would also want their name to be in this business.

    Are you not making pun on the girl who died by spreading such a message.
    I purely condemn such act.

    What is the purpose of celebrating friendship day, that person must have forgotten at the time of writing such a message.

    Yes, celebrate.
    Ppl do.
    We do.
    But by making such day friendship day aren’t you celebrating on the dead.
    Mocking on the one who passed.

    Ask the creator of this message this question.
    and to the one who has been addressed in it.

    I won’t comment on the issue of “The hero” thing, coz for me she is “the victim”.
    How come someone make a person hero pr protagonist in such hideous crime.
    On the issue of the battle against death I would still call her “the brave heart”.

    I don’t blame one two or there.
    I blame everyone.
    If the boy is to be blamed for boarding a private bus.
    The girl should be too.
    As she could have easily denied, and could have called for a cab or an auto.

    There can b a big debate on what should have been done and what not.

  6. I do support you on the issue of not making 16 dec- friendship day.
    As there would be other cases which would also want their name to be in this business.

    Are you not making pun on the girl who died by spreading such a message.
    I purely condemn such act.

    What is the purpose of celebrating friendship day, that person must have forgotten at the time of writing such a message.

    Yes, celebrate.
    Ppl do.
    We do.
    But by making such day friendship day aren’t you celebrating on the dead.
    Mocking on the one who passed.

    Ask the creator of this message this question.
    and to the one who has been addressed in it.

  7. this is exactly the kind of post which actually inspired me to blog in the first place.
    Now moving out to the Blog,
    AMAZING!!!!! Absolutely AMAZINGLY written.
    I love to critic your work, but this one was unarguably the best of your writings.
    Simply a treat to read!!!

    • I am pleased to hear from you Mayuri, this blog has came after a long time. I am myself happy that it has turned to be a likable post. Thanks for reading Mayuri. Surely appreciate that.

  8. Hey Aditya! Nice blog! We are on the same wavelength on this. If that guy would’ve behaved mature at that hour of the night, I don’t think this misdeed would’ve taken place.I don’t understand why people support such culprits, have mercy on them and spread such messages on their favor. How can they celebrate Friendship Day on 16th Dec when there was no friendship!! May that girl’s soul Rest In Peace!

  9. Hey Aditya! Nice Blog! We are on the same wavelength on this. If that guy would’ve behaved mature at that hour of the night, I don’t think this misdeed would’ve taken place. I don’t understand why people support such culprits,show mercy to them and rotate such messages on their favor. May that girl’s soul Rest In Peace!

  10. I agree with the fact that this message( or i should say a lame attempt) to get Indians emotionally ridiculed and forget the happiness a western cultured Friendship day brings is literally cheap….
    however i am bit astonished with the anger it has set in you….

    • Hello Mani,

      Not sure why you are astonished. I mean isn’t the message itself the answer? I mean how could one blame the girls’s family that they are minting money.

      Hope this answers.


  11. This thought was always there in my mind that the boy was not serious about her security …..however after reading your post I found more point on which Awindra is not right. And your lines “there will always be a sense of guilt in his mind through out his life.” will work on him.

  12. Adi,

    Strong topic with an extra strong blog post on it. I always liked your post because of that courage to actually write and express your actual views transparently to the world. After your Blog Post “An Open Letter to Late Jiah Khan”, this post I would say it’s something very strongly pointed and alarmed the heart directly.
    Keep writing, Keep sharing!!
    Gods Speed

  13. I totally agree with you. It was purely his mistake. I’m sure he must’ve gone through a lot of pain and guilt, but that’s how it is. He should’ve been much more protective. After 9 o’clock + winter season + alone with the girl + Delhi streets + Using a private bus, what the hell were you thinking???
    Well done Aditya for such a solid reply to these moron’s who created and circulated this message. The guy (Awindra) is alive and that’s more than enough for him; he has no right to demand for any money or compensation. The family deserved what they got, in-fact they deserve much more.

    • Hello Keith,

      Thanks for dropping by and reading this post, you are among those brave hearts who have survived reading this long post. 😉 Much appreciate that.

      I am happy to read that you and I are on same page, that is what is most important for me. I hope this blog reaches to maximum people and they start avoiding these kind of hoax messages and I wish people’s thoughts toward this matter changes too.

      Keep coming back 🙂

  14. Since the beginning I seriously don’t like the thing when people call him a ‘hero’. I think the girl was a real hero who fought till her last breadth. The victim’s family have gone through a major loss. The post you have shared has reminded me about the incident once again. And, this time without changing my opinion, I still believe that she was a real hero!

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