#TimetoChange – It’s time we let a women do what she wants and not what society expects.
— w3.adityabhasin.in (@meadityabhasin) March 9, 2012
If a man can choose not to marry then why can’t a woman. Why can’t a 30 yr old women say “I never wanted to marry, I am not going to marry”. Why does society always say that “a woman must marry if they want a settled life.”
With this post, I am trying to talk about things treated to be a social taboo. If I follow what my elders have made me understand is that earlier words and talks about ‘sex’ ‘teenage relationship’ ‘love marriages’ were taboo. Time has changed and so does the taboo things, no matter how educated we may be, but deep down a lot of us carry certain things as a taboo.
For a woman, not getting married is treated to be a taboo by our society. For a woman to have children without marriage is treated to be social crisis. And this is where I see a ray of positive change.
We’re living in a world where both men and women are doing good. In some areas women are exceptional and in some, men are masters of their job. Women are now turning to be more career oriented than man, and this is where the idea of being a mother and not a wife comes into picture. I see no issues in the approach of being a single mother- by choice.
Assume, a woman in her thirties, V-P of a company. Her parents left the idea of her marriage way back and now it’s no time to marry. ‘Getting married age’ for a woman inIndiais decided to be 25. If she crosses that mark, all our society will say that “she must be lacking somewhere, may be that’s why she could not settle down yet.” She has achieved whatever she wanted in her life and is now starving for more growth along with a ‘normal’ life.
In this situation, the same woman in her thirties decides to have children without getting married. She thinks that she will at least have somebody to take care of (who is not a nagging husband) and somebody who will take care of her, when she grows old. She decides that she will be a single mother.
A single mother does not mean that she will get involved in a sexual relationship with anybody to conceive. My idea is much broader and sensitive. She can have own child, she can directly walk-in into a sperm bank, decide on choice of her donor, get that sperm injected into her womb and have her own child. Or may be she can always adopt an orphan child as-well.
Why our society does needs to question a woman’s decision to be a single mother. Our society does not question what a man does, then why a woman should be questioned and brought under hammer of ‘Moral values.’
I believe, this thing must be accepted across the country and world, not only for heck of it but to bring a positive change in world around us.
Today’s woman is enough independent to care of herself and her children (without a husband). It should not be anyone’s business to interfere; it her life at the end of day.
(This post is part of IndiBlogger contest “Time to Change!”)
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About Aditya Bhasin
A not so creative person, Aditya Bhasin is a student of English literature (and wanted to be a networking expert.) He was born & brought up in Delhi and choose not to move out ever. You can find him at eating places more then his college, look for him at historical places more then his home, contact him through social media, easily, then a mobile phone. Aditya started blogging out of blue as an advice by his friend and is now addicted to it and can’t stop blogging.
He aspires to write a novel and be a successful media (communication) professional and does not want to be a social media consultant. Aditya is also a great supporter of women rights.